Author Archives: wpfaffenberger

Mr. Potato Head Now Gender Neutral

Mr. Potato Head Now Gender Neutral

Hasbro announced Mr. Potato Head will go gender neutral and is now just called “Potato Head.” Finishing the press conference with the new tag line, one executive exclaimed, “The only thing better than getting Potato Head is giving Potato Head!” Followed immediately by, “Nope, now I hear it. We’ll change that.” – Producer WillMORE

Will’s Distraction Podcast:  Episode 25:  Marshmallows!

Will’s Distraction Podcast: Episode 25: Marshmallows!

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/distraction/id1530188867 CLICK LINK TO SUBSCRIBE AND LISTEN! In episode 25, Will tries to teach you about the history and origins of marshmallows, but not without being sidetracked by a bunch of uninvited idiots. Performers: Aaron Stillerman, Matt Kerkhoff, Holly Brooke, and Steven Finch. Accompanied by Paige Scott. An improv comedy podcast where your host, Will,…MORE

Half Male Half Female Bird

Half Male Half Female Bird

This week, a long-time birdwatcher in Pennsylvania spotted a very rare, once-in-a-lifetime half-male, half-female cardinal: a scientific wonder of nature. The birdwatcher said he could tell it was both a man and a woman because all it did was argue with itself about where to go for dinner. – Producer WillMORE

Texas, Woof!

Texas, Woof!

The entire team of directors for the Texas power grid resigned today after their utilities catastrophically failed leaving Texans to suffer or die in a winter storm. One of their Senators, Ted Cruz, abandoned them for Cancun. Plus The Houston Texans. Lone Star’s not just their flag, it’s an accurate Yelp review for the state.…MORE

Flaccid Pizza Fixes?

Flaccid Pizza Fixes?

They need to make an erectile dysfunction pill for flaccid reheated thin crust pizza so it can get stiff and crispy again. I’d call it “Pie-Agra.” – Producer WillMORE

Airplane Engine Fell From Sky

Airplane Engine Fell From Sky

A giant United Airlines airplane engine exploded and fell from the sky in Denver and landed in the yards of a neighborhood below. Investigators are saying the engine likely separated from the plane because it was quote, “Tired of being asked to pull his damn mask back up during the flight.” Colleagues said the engine…MORE

Loch Ness Monster News

Loch Ness Monster News

This is for real: According to Virginia Polytechnic Institute science professor, Henry Bauer, the Loch Ness Monster is actually just a large undiscovered type of sea turtle that was trapped in the loch after the last Ice Age. As for Big Foot? Bauer says, “Well, that’s probably just a turtle in gorilla suit.” Some are…MORE

Mars Rover

Mars Rover

Mars rover, Perseverance, left Earth last July in the middle of the pandemic, contentious election, and civil unrest. It successfully landed on Mars today, and when NASA reached out for it’s first communication, Perseverance replied, “New phone. Who dis?” – Producer WillMORE

Food Floors

Food Floors

  Going on a year in quarantine with a 5 year old and a 17 month old, our floor is always just a carpet of crushed and smushed food. I’m thinking about replacing them with sewer grates. The floors, not the children. Yet. – Producer WillMORE

Will’s Distraction Podcast:  Nail Polish!

Will’s Distraction Podcast: Nail Polish!

          Learn about the history and origins of nail polish with a bunch of hilarious tangents.  Check it out now: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/distraction/id1530188867 – WillMORE